Dear Dad

I am dreading tomorrow. Dreading it. I dread it every year. I get so anxious looking at the approaching date, and sometimes send myself into a tailspin. You probably laugh at me every year, because that's how you were.

At Christmas this year, one of your sisters told me that your eulogy at your funeral that I wrote was so accurate in describing the person you were.

You were an amazing dad. Sometimes, you were tough. Sometimes, I didn't like you all that much. But I always loved you. Now that I'm older, I so much appreciate everything you taught me. You were always so proud of me.

I'm an amazing wife because you taught me to be a good person. I look at the way I teach, and I can't help but think you were probably the exact same. I feel like I was and am so much like you, but I can't be as good as you were. I'm taking the time to love my son, because your death taught me that time is important.

I miss you when I wake up, when I go to bed, when I'm stressed, overtired, happy. I miss you when I talk to mom, when I see my brothers, when I'm watching Fox News - haha! I miss you when I step in front of my students every day. I miss you when I talk about you with others, I miss you when I come home from a long day at work and I just want to talk to you about it.

I miss you every second of every day of my life. I just miss you.

I miss you.