We announced you today! You are, officially, no longer our best kept secret. It's been so funny to watch the reactions of various people.
Today was our 12 week appointment, and your dad and I floated out of Methodist Plaza downtown. Floated. We were giggling and grinning and practically skipping our way back to the car. It was such a relief to hear your heartbeat again, and know that you're really, really here.
It's been a trip so far. So I would like to write a blog based loosely off all the websites I look at every week, that tell me what my baby's (you) doing each week, what my body should be doing each week, how I might be feeling this week. Ha! They don't have anything on your mother's keen sense of humor and quips.
I've toyed with calling it The Unsuspecting Pregnant Lady, but that doesn't quite have the same ring to it. "What to Expect When You're Not Expecting" is hilarious, but doesn't get the point across. "What Not to Expect When You're Expecting" has the same opposite effect. I want something funny, but that gets the point across.
So we'll see, and who knows, the idea may fizzle out. We'll see. :)
But for now, here is the video that I posted today to announce you. We're so excited!
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Sun-Dried Tomato Turkey
For about the last week and a half, I have been LIVING on sun-dried tomato turkey sandwich, with mayo, mustard, lettuce (when I have it), swiss cheese, cheddar cheese and LOTS OF PICKLES. I've never really realized how good pickles are. Fricken A. They are so good...
Well Baby E - we're about 10 1/2 weeks along. That means only 2 1/2 weeks before your dad can start opening his mouth. And, oh is he excited about it. I am too, but I don't want all the unsolicited advice...or questions upon questions. I'd like to get it out in the open and for people to move on. It's like telling people you have AIDS. Only positive. Get it out in the open and get over it. Like my Grandma McGoff (Grundman) would say, "Good show!" and then move on!
I've noticed my abdomen is starting to get harder. Not really bigger (except for the bloating...thanks for that...) but definitely harder. I went shopping last Friday with your Grandma Engels - got some maternity clothes, some baby stuff. We both had a good time and we're both excited for you to get here! We're a quarter of the way through this pregnancy thing!
I can't wait for the pizza parties on the floor of the living room, the camping in the backyard, the football games (you're either going to be a Football Player or a Cheerleader. I think...), the times with your grandparents, the times with our friends. Watching you make your own friends and growing with them. Watching you learn - I'm so excited to watch you learn! One of the most amazing things as a teacher was watching my students learn. I'm so excited about that.
I'm so excited about you. So when you're a teenager and you're fighting me tooth and nail on something, remember I am so excited that you are here. When I don't like your college major, or the college you decided on, remember the best thing in the world to me is being a wife to your father and a mother to you. When you are reading this after finding out you're having your first child, I will be excited for you.
I already love you and you're not even here yet. :)
Well Baby E - we're about 10 1/2 weeks along. That means only 2 1/2 weeks before your dad can start opening his mouth. And, oh is he excited about it. I am too, but I don't want all the unsolicited advice...or questions upon questions. I'd like to get it out in the open and for people to move on. It's like telling people you have AIDS. Only positive. Get it out in the open and get over it. Like my Grandma McGoff (Grundman) would say, "Good show!" and then move on!
I've noticed my abdomen is starting to get harder. Not really bigger (except for the bloating...thanks for that...) but definitely harder. I went shopping last Friday with your Grandma Engels - got some maternity clothes, some baby stuff. We both had a good time and we're both excited for you to get here! We're a quarter of the way through this pregnancy thing!
I can't wait for the pizza parties on the floor of the living room, the camping in the backyard, the football games (you're either going to be a Football Player or a Cheerleader. I think...), the times with your grandparents, the times with our friends. Watching you make your own friends and growing with them. Watching you learn - I'm so excited to watch you learn! One of the most amazing things as a teacher was watching my students learn. I'm so excited about that.
I'm so excited about you. So when you're a teenager and you're fighting me tooth and nail on something, remember I am so excited that you are here. When I don't like your college major, or the college you decided on, remember the best thing in the world to me is being a wife to your father and a mother to you. When you are reading this after finding out you're having your first child, I will be excited for you.
I already love you and you're not even here yet. :)
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Grapes, Apples and Bananas, oh my!
My God. You are wreaking havoc on my life.
But in a good way. :)
As I said when I found out, I wish I could take it back. Now I'm glad I can't.
I've embraced the fact that I have a small pouch. A small pouch that no one will notice. People will only notice that I've "gained weight" - in what's really water retention, bloating, and you.
So let me go through all the terrible things you are putting me through.
1) Morning sickness isn't just morning sickness. It's momentary sickness. One moment, I will be fine. The other moment, I'm not so sure. It comes and goes and it's horrible when it comes, but I'm oh-so-thankful when it goes!!1
2) My diet has been thrown into high gear. I can no longer eat crap, like I tried doing last Sunday night. That threw me (and you) into a tailspin of nausea that I was positive would end me up with my head in the toilet. But alas, I survived and after spending Monday in bed, felt good enough to get up.
3) My clothes are getting tighter. I'm having a hard time getting into my jeans - they fit all over except for the stomach. I can button the button, but it's uncomfortable and quite frankly, I'd prefer not too b/c it's more comfortable that way.
4) I wake up in the middle of the night. Every night. Mainly to pee.
But with each one of these things comes something wonderful... you. Each time I feel sick, it's a reminder that you're here. I am thankful you are forcing me to eat more healthily. My clothes are getting tighter, but it'll be exciting to be a cute pregnant woman. And I wake up in the middle of the night, not only to pee, but because I'm so excited for you to get here.
And we have 33 long weeks to go.
But no worries. You'll be here soon enough. And we can't wait.
But in a good way. :)
As I said when I found out, I wish I could take it back. Now I'm glad I can't.
I've embraced the fact that I have a small pouch. A small pouch that no one will notice. People will only notice that I've "gained weight" - in what's really water retention, bloating, and you.
So let me go through all the terrible things you are putting me through.
1) Morning sickness isn't just morning sickness. It's momentary sickness. One moment, I will be fine. The other moment, I'm not so sure. It comes and goes and it's horrible when it comes, but I'm oh-so-thankful when it goes!!1
2) My diet has been thrown into high gear. I can no longer eat crap, like I tried doing last Sunday night. That threw me (and you) into a tailspin of nausea that I was positive would end me up with my head in the toilet. But alas, I survived and after spending Monday in bed, felt good enough to get up.
3) My clothes are getting tighter. I'm having a hard time getting into my jeans - they fit all over except for the stomach. I can button the button, but it's uncomfortable and quite frankly, I'd prefer not too b/c it's more comfortable that way.
4) I wake up in the middle of the night. Every night. Mainly to pee.
But with each one of these things comes something wonderful... you. Each time I feel sick, it's a reminder that you're here. I am thankful you are forcing me to eat more healthily. My clothes are getting tighter, but it'll be exciting to be a cute pregnant woman. And I wake up in the middle of the night, not only to pee, but because I'm so excited for you to get here.
And we have 33 long weeks to go.
But no worries. You'll be here soon enough. And we can't wait.
Sunday, September 4, 2011
"As soon as I saw you, I knew an adventure was going to happen." -Winnie the Pooh
An adventure is right. I only found out a few nights ago that I was pregnant, but it's been a whirlwind already!
I was on a business trip and having strange cramps. I thought for sure I was getting my period, but every time I ran to the bathroom, there was nothing there.
Your dad and I had decided that it was time to try for Baby E #1. We were scared and skeptical and it was kind of crazy even thinking about it, but we were both in a good place (besides the fact that your father broke his hand and had surgery on August 11, the day before we were "supposed" to start trying to conceive...) mentally, emotionally and hopefully financially.
So we tried and I didn't expect much. My best friend (who you will meet and grow to love through the years, I'm sure) and her husband have been trying for quite some time, and following a miscarriage, have been unsuccessful. I thought for sure we would be trying for at least a couple of months.
I was pretty excited about it more for the shock factor. You'll probably figure out, as your mother, I like to throw curve balls. It's always fun to catch people off guard, but your father had other ideas. As soon as we both agreed we were ready for you to be in our lives, he told everyone he came into contact with. It could have been the pain pills he was on when he broke his hand, but he told your Grandma and Grandpa Engels, a bunch of his friends and really everyone including the mailman (not really, but you get the idea.)
So I don't think it was any surprise when we went to a get-together with a bunch of our friends (who already have children...some have 2...) and I wasn't drinking (you'll also realize, as your mother, that I like my wine). No one said anything to me, so obviously, the shock factor won't be there. I guess it might with a few people, as I haven't told everyone I know yet... unless your father has.
ANYWAY - I came home that Thursday night (the 1st of September) and was curious. I had bought pregnancy tests in hopes of you, and had taken two already, but both were negative. Although over the course of 24 hours, one turned to positive, which your dad let me know about over the phone. I told him it was a fluke and he seemed very disappointed.
As I was driving home that Thursday night I remember talking on the phone to your dad, telling him about these weird cramps and I didn't know if it was my period coming or maybe we were pregnant. I remember him saying in this high-pitched, overly-exaggerated voice, "Oh my Gawd, we're PREGNANT!" I have to tell you, your dad has wanted you for quite a while. So he seemed pretty excited at the possibility, but I knew he didn't want to get his hopes up.
So I got home Thursday night and screwed around on the computer. I remember being so incredibly tired, so I decided about 11:15 to go up to bed. I thought I might as well take a pregnancy test, just to see. I told your dad earlier that I might take one, but I don't think he remembered as I went up to bed.
So I took a home pregnancy test, carefully laid it on the bathroom counter, ran water in the sink to wash my face, changed into my pajamas, then went back to the bathroom to wash my face - all this time forgetting about the pregnancy test because I expected it to come out negative. The cramps I was having HAD to just be period cramps, right?
But as I walked into the bathroom, grabbed the face wash from the shower behind the sink, I remembered the pregnancy test. I turned around much faster and there it was - two blue lines. And "as soon as I saw you, I knew an adventure was going to happen."
I remember thinking (pardon my language) "Holy shit." I just looked at myself in the mirror, my mind going much faster than a million miles a minute (like it normally does, right?). I wasn't sure if I needed to call up Eric, or just wait to surprise him when he came upstairs. I washed my face, thinking about everything that was about to change in our lives. I was going to get fat. Selfish, I know, but I've always been proud of keeping myself looking good, and I don't want to get fat. I kept thinking about how badly I wanted to tell my dad, your Grandpa, who I am so sorry you won't ever have the absolutely blessing to know. He was an amazing person. I kept thinking of how I would want to surprise people by telling them - not really HOW to surprise them, just that I couldn't wait to actually surprise them.
I turned off the water, dried off my face, and listened to your dad turn off the TV, walk around locking doors and windows. Then turning off the lights. Then walking upstairs. I just stood at the bathroom sink, looking in the mirror at my face, looking for signs of being pregnant. Did I look any different?
Your dad came upstairs, walked past the bathroom and while he did, looked at me and said something. For God's sake, I had been tearing up, so my eyes were red-rimmed and I looked panicked. At least, to myself I did...but your dad doesn't really notice those things. He walked into our bedroom, turned on the TV, walked around looking for something. All the while, I'm peeking out the doorway, looking at him, waiting for him to turn around and look at me so he can at least read my face!
I grabbed the test, held myself and the test halfway out the doorway and waited patiently for him to notice me. He didn't. So I finally said, "Eric." He turned, looked at me, looked at my hand holding the test and said, "Oh my God. Oh my God!" Your dad was so excited...he's been waiting for this for so long.
And the first thing I could say was: "I want to take it back." Your dad laughed to himself, but in that one second, I wasn't prepared for it. Saying we would like to be pregnant and then actually being pregnant are two different things. All I could think of, being the negative one in this relationship, were all the negative things that come along with being pregnant. Getting fat, being uncomfortable and not getting to wear my cute clothes that I own for one.
Your dad replied with, "You want to take it back?!" That's when I explained it - but it was such a shock to me. I didn't know how I was supposed to react to the news. Then I told him I wish my dad were here so I could tell him. And you're wise old dad said, "He knows." And he's right - in all of this, my dad is the first person that knew and knew probably before we did. And I know he couldn't be more happy for us. :)
So then your dad and I couldn't get to sleep and couldn't get to sleep, even though we were both exhausted. But, we did and when I took another pregnancy test in the morning, it confirmed everything we thought.
You're here. And we couldn't be more excited.
I was on a business trip and having strange cramps. I thought for sure I was getting my period, but every time I ran to the bathroom, there was nothing there.
Your dad and I had decided that it was time to try for Baby E #1. We were scared and skeptical and it was kind of crazy even thinking about it, but we were both in a good place (besides the fact that your father broke his hand and had surgery on August 11, the day before we were "supposed" to start trying to conceive...) mentally, emotionally and hopefully financially.
So we tried and I didn't expect much. My best friend (who you will meet and grow to love through the years, I'm sure) and her husband have been trying for quite some time, and following a miscarriage, have been unsuccessful. I thought for sure we would be trying for at least a couple of months.
I was pretty excited about it more for the shock factor. You'll probably figure out, as your mother, I like to throw curve balls. It's always fun to catch people off guard, but your father had other ideas. As soon as we both agreed we were ready for you to be in our lives, he told everyone he came into contact with. It could have been the pain pills he was on when he broke his hand, but he told your Grandma and Grandpa Engels, a bunch of his friends and really everyone including the mailman (not really, but you get the idea.)
So I don't think it was any surprise when we went to a get-together with a bunch of our friends (who already have children...some have 2...) and I wasn't drinking (you'll also realize, as your mother, that I like my wine). No one said anything to me, so obviously, the shock factor won't be there. I guess it might with a few people, as I haven't told everyone I know yet... unless your father has.
ANYWAY - I came home that Thursday night (the 1st of September) and was curious. I had bought pregnancy tests in hopes of you, and had taken two already, but both were negative. Although over the course of 24 hours, one turned to positive, which your dad let me know about over the phone. I told him it was a fluke and he seemed very disappointed.
As I was driving home that Thursday night I remember talking on the phone to your dad, telling him about these weird cramps and I didn't know if it was my period coming or maybe we were pregnant. I remember him saying in this high-pitched, overly-exaggerated voice, "Oh my Gawd, we're PREGNANT!" I have to tell you, your dad has wanted you for quite a while. So he seemed pretty excited at the possibility, but I knew he didn't want to get his hopes up.
So I got home Thursday night and screwed around on the computer. I remember being so incredibly tired, so I decided about 11:15 to go up to bed. I thought I might as well take a pregnancy test, just to see. I told your dad earlier that I might take one, but I don't think he remembered as I went up to bed.
So I took a home pregnancy test, carefully laid it on the bathroom counter, ran water in the sink to wash my face, changed into my pajamas, then went back to the bathroom to wash my face - all this time forgetting about the pregnancy test because I expected it to come out negative. The cramps I was having HAD to just be period cramps, right?
But as I walked into the bathroom, grabbed the face wash from the shower behind the sink, I remembered the pregnancy test. I turned around much faster and there it was - two blue lines. And "as soon as I saw you, I knew an adventure was going to happen."
I remember thinking (pardon my language) "Holy shit." I just looked at myself in the mirror, my mind going much faster than a million miles a minute (like it normally does, right?). I wasn't sure if I needed to call up Eric, or just wait to surprise him when he came upstairs. I washed my face, thinking about everything that was about to change in our lives. I was going to get fat. Selfish, I know, but I've always been proud of keeping myself looking good, and I don't want to get fat. I kept thinking about how badly I wanted to tell my dad, your Grandpa, who I am so sorry you won't ever have the absolutely blessing to know. He was an amazing person. I kept thinking of how I would want to surprise people by telling them - not really HOW to surprise them, just that I couldn't wait to actually surprise them.
I turned off the water, dried off my face, and listened to your dad turn off the TV, walk around locking doors and windows. Then turning off the lights. Then walking upstairs. I just stood at the bathroom sink, looking in the mirror at my face, looking for signs of being pregnant. Did I look any different?
Your dad came upstairs, walked past the bathroom and while he did, looked at me and said something. For God's sake, I had been tearing up, so my eyes were red-rimmed and I looked panicked. At least, to myself I did...but your dad doesn't really notice those things. He walked into our bedroom, turned on the TV, walked around looking for something. All the while, I'm peeking out the doorway, looking at him, waiting for him to turn around and look at me so he can at least read my face!
I grabbed the test, held myself and the test halfway out the doorway and waited patiently for him to notice me. He didn't. So I finally said, "Eric." He turned, looked at me, looked at my hand holding the test and said, "Oh my God. Oh my God!" Your dad was so excited...he's been waiting for this for so long.
And the first thing I could say was: "I want to take it back." Your dad laughed to himself, but in that one second, I wasn't prepared for it. Saying we would like to be pregnant and then actually being pregnant are two different things. All I could think of, being the negative one in this relationship, were all the negative things that come along with being pregnant. Getting fat, being uncomfortable and not getting to wear my cute clothes that I own for one.
Your dad replied with, "You want to take it back?!" That's when I explained it - but it was such a shock to me. I didn't know how I was supposed to react to the news. Then I told him I wish my dad were here so I could tell him. And you're wise old dad said, "He knows." And he's right - in all of this, my dad is the first person that knew and knew probably before we did. And I know he couldn't be more happy for us. :)
So then your dad and I couldn't get to sleep and couldn't get to sleep, even though we were both exhausted. But, we did and when I took another pregnancy test in the morning, it confirmed everything we thought.
You're here. And we couldn't be more excited.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
The first chapter to the rest of my life...
A lot has happened - mainly, I got a new job. HALLELUJAH! It was definitely fate...or my dad...who had a hand in it. My boss seems really awesome, my duties will still be working with kids, and I'll still be feeding that educator in me. I'm excited, but I'm apprehensive. And who could blame me? Look at the situations I've been thrown into in the last four years.
So I'm excited about this new chapter. It will be hard, it will be exciting, it will be stressful and it will be fun. But this is the first chapter to the rest of my life. We'll see how the book ends up.
I've been thinking of my dad a lot lately...then again, when don't I think about my dad? I wonder what he's thinking. I wonder what sign he'll show me that it will be ok. The sky last night while Eric and I were fishing was spectacular. The a beautiful sunset, dark clouds and a rainbow. It was gorgeous and I'm glad I was able to see it as I'm supposed to see it. Simply sun, clouds and a rainbow. Maybe sometimes I look for more in that, but really, it's nice to enjoy things simply.
So for right now, especially since I'm not prepping for next year, I'll just enjoy the simple things. It's nice to know I've got a new direction to go in.
So dad, what do you think about that? I'll be waiting for the answer.
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