Speech Regression

About 2 months ago, I went to Adventureland with my cousin and her son, who is only 6 weeks older than James. I was impressed by his use of speech, and when I mentioned it, she said his speech had really taken off in the last month or so. People always talk about never comparing kids, so although I did a really good job of accepting it for what it was, I was still curious if it would happen for James that way.

About a month ago, I noticed James wasn't making a whole lot of sense when he would talk. I didn't think much of it, considering he is also working on so many other developmental milestones. But it still made me wonder. But in the hustle and bustle of life with a newborn, I again, didn't think anything of it.

On Friday, our daycare provider sat me down and told me the cold, hard truth of what she sees at daycare. James went from an easily 100+ word vocabulary to hardly anything at all. He frequently says mama/mom, Dada/dad, ball, up, down and a handful of other words, but he wasnt using words he used to use, like sit, milk, cup, water, walk and others.

She is no doctor, but she has been doing daycare for 12 years and has three kids. I think the woman knows what she's doing. But it was still a blow to the chest.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized Eric and I use too many yes/no questions, and not asking James to express himself using his words.

I immediately came home and googled the hell out of it. And came to the conclusion that James does talk a lot, but he doesn't make any sense. In other words its a whole lot of jibberish thrown in with a few "mom" and "dad's." I was mortified I didn't pick up on it sooner.

Of course, the most common diagnosis with speech regression is Autism. And if James were to be autistic, I would still love him unconditionally. But as I only speak the truth, I knew that if he were autistic, it would be a very difficult and tiring road to travel.

I don't think that's the case. Watching him play with the neighbor kids this weekend and play with us too, I know in my heart he isn't autistic. He still makes eye contact and still loves to socialize. He loves hugs and kisses and cares very much for Catherine.

But in trying to pinpoint when James' speech began to regress escaped me. Until Saturday, when talking to our daycare provider again, she about smacked me upside the head.

Catherine was born a few months ago.

So after a debilitating bout of food poisoning Sunday, I googled the shit out of that. It seems like its pretty common. That's why the experts don't recommend potty training a toddler before a sibling is born; they usually regress. Apparently, the same can happen with speech.

Christy, our daycare provider (sent from heaven, by the way), suggested we lay off the yes/no questions and instead encourage James to use his words.

Just in a few short days, I have noticed a difference. Although he doesn't use them of his own volition, when we ask James to use his words, he does. There are still words missing, but like potty training regression, I know they will come back.

Parenting is the most stressful, tiring, exciting, fulfilling thing I have ever done. I love my little boy with a passion I didn't know I had, and to see him "regress" in any way is difficult. But it's my job to help shape him, and by God, a little regression isn't going to stop me, or him, from being successful.

So until then, here is to words like fish, dog, cat, sit, milk and all the other words I know will come back.