39 Weeks!

There are people who say that God doesn't give you what you can't handle. There are also people who say that's a crock of shit. I am one of them.

I walk into our house and NOTHING is being done on our kitchen. Except for half a floor being laid for a couple of hours, and my painting. That's right, me. Up on a ladder. 3 feet above the ground and reaching up to the ceiling to paint. Because that's not dangerous or anything.

I slipped in the driveway of our daycare provider on Monday after my PT appointment, while carrying Catherine because I had forgotten it was supposed to snow (or I didn't even realize? it seems like so long ago, I'm not really sure). Since then, I have been able to barely walk. But yet I would come home to another crockpot creation or leftovers, feed myself and the kids, change into gross clothes and get to work painting. Thankfully today, I had another PT appointment, so it helped me immensely. Hopefully tomorrow, I'll be able to walk.

Every time I turn over in bed, my pubic bone pops. No joke. I didn't even know it was possible that you could dislocate your pubic bone, but apparently, I have. Your pubic bone is supposed to line up horizontal. Mine does not any more, thanks to this baby. So now when I pop my pubic bone, it kills. The pressure is unbelievable and the pain is pretty incredible. All in all, I am so excited to be done with this pregnancy.

School has been increasingly difficult. It's hard to find the motivation to be the "dog and pony show" that I was before I was so incredibly heavy, pregnant, and uncomfortable. I teach bell-to-bell, which I know there are several teachers out there who don't. I am on all the time, and I expect my students to be on all the time. And yesterday, I actually let them have 10 minutes of class time to themselves. I never allow that. EVER. And yesterday, because I was so uncomfortable just from standing in front of them, I had to sit down and let them have that ten minutes.

I am so tired and hardly sleeping. I have been hiring my 14 year old neighbor girl and my daycare providers 14 year old daughter to watch my kids so I can do the things around the house that Eric would normally help me with, but can't because he has all these jobs that are coming due.

Today, a colleague, who has the same due date as me, gave birth to a healthy baby boy. And all day I got to deal with, "You have 12 hours to have your baby at the same time as Cassie!" Or, "think you'll go today too?" No. I don't think I'll go today, or tomorrow, or the next. Because that's not how my pregnancy works. But here I am, surrounded by people who apparently have their babies early. Talk about repeated slaps in the face!

And at the end of the day, I am incredibly lonely. I feel like I'm doing this parenting, and this pregnancy, all by myself. There came a time today when I wondered if Eric would even be able to stay with me in the hospital, or if he would have to go finish a job somewhere. He swears the kitchen will be done in time, he swears he will have everything finished, hopefully by Monday, but in the end, I don't foresee it happening. I am throwing up prayers to my dad all the time, asking him to help Eric get everything done in time, but unless there is a miracle, I don't think it will happen. It almost feels like I will forever be walking on a combination of half done walnut wood flooring, subfloor, 80's linoleum and the old laminant flooring we laid when we first moved in, which is still in our foyer.

Onward, I guess.

Random Thoughts from This Week: Are we done yet?
Maternity clothes? they are taunting me from the closet. Will today be the last day I get to wear my hot pink pants? Will tomorrow be the last day I wear my cute wrap dress? I am ready to put them away! 
Weight gain? Yes, which led to an interesting convo at the doctor's office.
Stretch marks? Nope!
Best moment this week? Last Friday night I went to Christy's with the rest of the "cul-de-sac" girls and they proceeded to make me 20 freezer meals for after the baby gets here. I couldn't believe it. Most likely, with leftovers, that will last me an entire month. I was floored and so touched that they would think to do that for me. It was also a lot of fun to just sit around afterward and chat.
Worst moment this week? On Friday, Catherine threw up, on Saturday she had a fever all day, and on Sunday, I finally took her to Urgent Care. Guess what? A fucking ear infection. So we tried an ALL NEW family of anti-biotics. It seems to have worked, but those three days were endless. Then James had a fever and cough on Sunday night, but luckily didn't wake up with a fever on Monday, so off to daycare he went, although he was clearly not feeling well. Last night was the first night that both of my babies seemed to be in good moods and feeling good. Just in time, right?
What the doctor says: Still very swollen, still dilated to a 3. He tried stretching me, but just like with James and Catherine, I have not noticed anything and doubt I will. Just some blood-tinged mucous, but that is what happens every time. Luckily, my conversation about my swelling, weight gain AND how I tend to have big babies no matter what size I turn out to be lead him to try to get me an induction next week. Which is another reason why I have been freaking out. It looks like it could be Thursday, and that's a week from today. And we are nowhere near finishing the kitchen, or the hall bath, or really, do we have any semblance of order in our house.
Any symptoms? Just a ton of contractions that never go anywhere. Typical!
Movement? Probably not. I am going to be pregnant forever.
Anything make you queasy or sick? Not that I know of, but I have been feeling nauseous. Every little thing that I say to anyone gets the reply, "Oh, it could be anytime!" Yeah, it should be!
Looking forward to: Holy shitballs, getting this baby out.

Here's to one more week... maybe.

38 Weeks!

It's funny that every week seems to get busier... and busier... and busier. Eric and I have barely seen each other the past week, I've been in charge of the kids by myself, at this point in my pregnancy, and I am fricken exhausted. I am hoping this baby comes early, but then again, I don't.

Random Thoughts from This Week: James has become obsessed with the movie "Home" in which the cute, animated aliens are called "Boovs." I'm wondering if that was just some sick, perverted joke the writers put in there, knowing that all little girls and boys would not be able to pronounce the "v" and just say "Boobs."
Maternity clothes? Oh Lordy, things are getting smaller. At this point, I'm not looking in my closet to see what clothes I'll be able to wear again when I'm not pregnant, but I'm looking at the maternity clothes I'll be able to wear again when I'm not pregnant. 
Weight gain? No, surprisingly. Although we have been busy as hell, so that could be part of it!
Stretch marks? Nope!
Best moment this week? Uhhh... I have been having some really great rehearsals at school lately... that's about all. And the drywall was finished on our kitchen today. So... that's done with. Now it will be time to paint...
Worst moment this week? Catherine's ear infection came back on Monday, and today, I was home with a sick James. Just an elevated fever and cough, but still...
What the doctor says: Still very swollen, dilated to a 3, "should have a baby in the next few weeks." haha.........
Any symptoms? Yes! When I went to the doctor on Tuesday, I told him we needed to get things moving. He laughed, but then did some stuff to try and get things moving. It hurts, but since then, we've had bloody mucous-y discharge. Continuously. Hopefully, that was the sign Baby E3 needs to start the process... And hopefully, but not hopefully, the process doesn't take too long...
Movement? Yes, and I think it's downward. You've been making me cringe for a couple days now. Hello lightning crotch!
Anything make you queasy or sick? Ummm, nope, not that I can remember, that is.
Looking forward to: When Eric's "hell" week is over with. Which is not looking good. I am so thankful he is in high demand, in late January, which is unusual for the construction business, but I'm not excited about the late nights, no forward movement on our kitchen (except the drywall) and really, I am ready to be done being pregnant. I am looking forward to this weekend when I have our babysitter coming over so I can do some work in the kitchen and hopefully get some things done with freezer meals, but we will see. OH YES! I am also looking forward to my girls night out tomorrow night - but really it's a night in and we're making freezer meals. Wahoo! I can't wait.

Here's to two more weeks........ hopefully, but not.

37 Weeks!

So I thought last week was bad. It does not even come close to what this week has been. Needless to say, it's been filled with sleepless nights, 12+ hour work days, absolutely NO movement forward on the kitchen, but yet, so many things have been decided and delivered (but not our damn cabinet yet!). It's been a whirlwind and Eric and I are so incredibly tired. Holy hell.

Random Thoughts from This Week: I am absolutely dreading the weight that I will have to lose after Baby E gets here. Ugh.
Maternity clothes? Yes. I broke out some leggings that I haven't worn before that are thicker since it's been so cold. Nope, don't even go up over my belly. Someone, get this baby out of me. I just can't wait to get back to the clothes that I am used to. Y'know, the ones that won't fit for like, 9 months while I lose this baby weight.
Weight gain? Hahaha, yes. I stepped on the scale at my doctor's appointment the other day and about fell off again. Up FIVE pounds. Really? The doctor assured me it's most likely water weight, and I do remember having something similar happen with both Catherine and James, but seriously, it doesn't make a person feel good. Up five pounds in about 2 1/2 weeks? That's not good at all...
Stretch marks? Nope!
Best moment this week? My mother-in-law had Casey's pizza delivered to our house last night. After the week we have had, it was an amazing gesture and we were so thankful.
Worst moment this week? James has been getting up multiple times a night. Combine that with the fact that I, too, am up multiple times a night peeing, it's been terrible. I finally broke down and told him that if he gets up in the middle of the night to come and lay with mom and dad, we will read one less book the next night. I felt awful about doing it that way. I talked to our daycare provider about it, who has become like my Nanny 911 at times, and she suggested giving him incentives, like having someone over to play. Well, Eric and I are going on a day date to finish out everything for our kitchen remodel (faucet, vanity for the bathroom etc., backsplash, wood for the open cabinetry in teh middle), and a little bit of "us" time, and our next door neighbor girl is coming to play. James LOVES her, so that is his incentive, even though he's going to get it. After many sleepless nights, last night, he stayed in his bed all night. This morning was even adorable as he yelled from his doorway, "Mom! Is it morning time yet?" And I was rested enough to actually reply back. It was better than the morning before when he got up, turned on all the lights in the upstairs at 5:00 a.m. and then went DOWNSTAIRS and turned on cartoons. Ugh.
What the doctor says: I am very swollen, so I need to watch that. I am dilated to about a 2, which is no surprise considering the contractions combined with the fact I am on my third pregnancy in four and a half years. I asked him about my extreme thirst, and he said that's pretty natural at this point. Especially in the winter. He suggested using a humidifier. Baby E is still pretty high, but a lot can happen quickly and since my babies seem to come without a problem, he said to be on the ready once contractions really start moving along. Looking forward to next week!
Movement? Yep. And I've noticed that when I have a contraction, you like to "push back." It's incredibly painful and uncomfortable, but all is well.
Anything make you queasy or sick? I don't think just one thing has been making me queasy, but just overall third trimester nausea has set in. There are times where I don't think I'm going to make it. It's tough!
Looking forward to: Mine and Eric's day date on Saturday. It's much needed and I'm hoping that we have some fun, that I don't feel crappy, that we both get some sleep the night before, and we get everything done that we need to. *sigh* God help us.

Hello week 37!

36 Weeks!

Holy hell. What a week it has been. Tuesday we had Catherine's 18 month appointment (at 19 months....... oops!) and she had a fever and a raging ear infection, which we had suspected. So instead of getting her shots, she got Amoxicillin and another appointment for two weeks out. It was a good appointment, but it was a little disheartening. Again, the doctor mentioned spina bifida, which I really don't believe she has. Then she mentioned she was concerned about her lack of talking, or more specifically, the fact that she only says "Mama" for mom and "Nom nom" (no joke) for food. Sometimes we can coax "dada" out of her, but otherwise, she is mum. I keep telling them that I have a niece who was the exact same way: walked late, talked late, and now she's a normal 5 year old. I'm guessing Catherine isn't too good at her words yet, because she was spending so much time concentrating on those gross motor skills she needed to WALK. Now that she's walking, she's become so much more like a TODDLER. So I kind of waved it off, but made sure that I called the Physical Therapist for a consult with a Speech Pathologist.

Thursday was that appointment, and I have never met a more enthusiastic speech pathologist in my life. Holy crap. This lady was like Marcia from The Brady Bunch Movie. It was incredible. But she was very nice, and she said she would recommend a speech and language consult in a couple of months since she's not really using her words. Well, I hate to put it like this, but I was concerned about our appointment. Catherine was not herself. She literally just stared at the physical therapist and speech pathologist, and really just wanted to be held. And Thursday was the beginning of a very cranky weekend for Catherine.

Long story short, Saturday was terrible and she was completely out of sorts. I almost took her to Urgent Care because I truly did not know what was wrong. Even moreso on Sunday. Sunday was even worse. I noticed on Saturday she was developing some eczema on her stomach, but I thought it was because it's winter, James has some eczema in a couple of places (behind his knees) during the winter, so I didn't think too much of it. Until she woke up on Monday morning with her cheeks, forehead and chin covered in eczema. I called the doctor and said it looked like to me that not only was she having an allergic reaction to the Amoxicillin, but she was also clearly not over her ear infection. We got a new medication that night and boom, by Tuesday night, we had a completely different little girl. Thank God, because the weekend was a nightmare.

Not only were we trying to deal with that, but in all our kitchen designing and re-designing, Eric and I forgot to order a 6 inch spice cabinet. Yep, that's right. There is one 6 inch cabinet that is keeping us from making hardly ANY progress on our kitchen. We are at a complete standstill. Luckily, that gave Eric a little time to finish our bathroom, which he did, and it looks amazing. I have yet to take some pictures because he has yet to switch out the toilets, so the new one is just sitting there in the boxes, but it's lovely. I love love love it! So glad that is off our plate. And so glad we got the tub we did. It's been a huge help in keeping me comfortable, that's for sure!

But I digress. So Eric and I have to order this new cabinet. I thought it was going to be as easy as going on the website and ordering it again, until I got to the shipping and handling, which was going to be FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS. Yes, for a $190 cabinet. I was appalled. So last Wednesday I called the company, and by Tuesday, they hadn't gotten back to me. So I called again. Needless to say, I did some digging and found another dealer of our cabinets that would ship the same cabinet for $60. Only we would be paying about $40 more for the cabinet because Eric gets a contractor discount with the current cabinet company. So, we had a bargaining chip, and they were able to help us out with it. It hasn't been a real pleasant experience, but it's done and cabinet will be here on Wednesday.

I haven't really had a chance to nest yet, as I don't really have room to put any diapers, clothes or anything for this third baby. We don't have a nursery for him, so I'm having trouble figuring out just what to do with all the stuff that you would normally keep in a nursery. So I tried rearranging Catherine's room, but that didn't help at all. Finally, Eric told me to just order a dresser, which is exactly what I did (eeeeeek!) and it will be here on Tuesday. That will seriously be the only thing that Baby E3 will have that is his "space." That's where I'll keep his diapers, clothes, and anything else he might require. Luckily (unluckily?) Catherine is still in diapers, so the changing table that I bought with her will definitely be used, when I thought we weren't going to use it for very long. Haha. Silly me.

Otherwise, it's seriously been balls-to-the-wall busy. I feel like I am constantly doing something that has to do with my health (see below), Catherine's physical therapy, not sleeping, or ordering stuff for the kitchen (or sending it back...grr). So onward, so this week's incredibly blurry update.

Random Thoughts from This Week: I do not know why I have sucked so badly at making meals for the past 12 years Eric and I have been together. Seriously, I have been forced to make crockpot creations almost every night, thanks to not having a stove, and I become the worlds greatest cook? It's amazing what you can make in a crockpot, and amazing how easy it is. Not sure why I haven't done this before!
Maternity clothes? Yes. I am going to try my jeans for the last time tomorrow, I believe, since it's jeans day at work. But I can't guarantee anything.
Weight gain? Now that I'm back at work not eating crappy food? Probably not...
Stretch marks? Nope!
Best moment this week? Again, it was physical therapy. I didn't feel better right out of the gate, but tonight I feel the best I have in awhile. She manipulated some things and gave me some exercises, as well as some tips when I'm moving (transverse abs, anyone?). Tonight, 24 hours later, has been great (even though I'm really swollen, at least I can move!). Also, prenatal massages. Why have I never gotten those before?
Worst moment this week? James has been getting into our bed at night, while I'm passed out apparently, and I will wake up with a little butt in my face, while Kinnick, our cat, is on the other side. I am a person who likes my space, and when I wake up sardined between a 3.5 year old and a cat, I can feel myself getting pissed. It's like, "lay with someone else!" Holy hell. Then when James isn't creeping in our bed, Eric will sometimes make his way to my side of the bed because it's deflated all the way, which causes him to "fall" that direction, and I will wake up with my face in his armpit, or his elbow on my forehead. Ugh, it's so annoying! So then I have to get up with James and walk him back to bed, and then I have to make sure I pee, because of course, once I'm upright, gravity takes hold. Not only that, but moving around in bed has sucked, and Monday night, my pubic bone literally popped. It was the most horrifying, disgusting noise I have ever heard. And then, I was in pain. So of course, I was up from 4:00 a.m. I could hardly walk. Luckily, at physical therapy that night, I described it to her and she was able to "diagnose" it as the fact I had dislocated my pubis. What? How does that even happen? Is that possible? Well, when you're this pregnant, it is possible, because your pubic bone is so separated. So she gave me some exercises, manipulated my hips and tried to get it to pop back into place, which is wouldn't, and unfortunately sent me on my hobbling way. And let me tell you, I hobbled. It was horrible. BUT, I've been doing the exercises and I actually feel SO MUCH BETTER! Hallelujah! So maybe my "pubis" moved back into place? I don't know, but thank God. On another note, I am so swollen that even my boots the other day were hard to get off. The ones that I wore religiously with Catherine with lots of leggings and dresses. Yep, could hardly get them off! Ugh!
Movement? Yes, and today was terrible. You kept stretching out toward the front of my belly, and I kept having to push you back! It was incredibly painful. Then, I get home, and have to stand in front of a dying griddle for 1.5 hours because I was making pancakes and sausage, and started having braxton hicks. Bad bad bad. I had to breathe through a few of them. So after supper FINALLY got done, I threw myself in the bath and I feel a lot better. And you're moving a lot less now. Maybe it's because we're both tired from the day.
Anything make you queasy or sick? The way some people smell, which is weird to say. But seriously, so people not realize how they smell? Just because you don't wear cologne doesn't mean you naturally smell delicious. Good lord. Spray yourselves!
Looking forward to: Tomorrow's physical therapy appointment, Saturday'd mommy/son date with James to see Goodnight Moon at the Civic Center (I HATE that book, but we have two copies and James likes to read it along with me at night, so I thought this would be cool for him), Tuesday is my birthday and finals start, so I'll have two nice long periods in which to get things done. The dresser comes Tuesday, the cabinet comes Wednesday and hopefully by the next day, we'll be able to start laying flooring. Hopefully. I hope we get this kitchen done in time for Baby E's arrival!

Here's to the ninth month of pregnancy!