16 Weeks!

It has been a trying week, to say the least.

Thursday, I took two students to an honor choir. That night, it rained. And not just any rain, but freezing rain.

To put a damper on it even more, I had a 9 pound child come out my vagina. Things aren't the same anymore. As in, not the same. So with my debilitating cough, I had to wear maxi pads. And not just panty liners, but I'm-12-again maxi pads. Which meant I had to give up my thongs and wear real underwear. Needless to say, that in itself was uncomfortable. But let's get back to the freezing rain, shall we?

So while at this honor choir, I was trying so hard to stifle my debilitating cough during the concert, and squeeze my legs together as tight as possible so I wouldn't pee as much when I did cough, that the person sitting next to me asked me on more than one occasion if I was all right. I took over 100 "hits" off my inhaler during that concert, and still, nothing. Oh, did I mention that I was diagnosed with viral-induced asthma? That would be the reason why every year, when I contract the common cold, it becomes some horrible, debilitating cough. Because normal people will cough up the nasties, but my bronchials are so tight (like someone with asthma), that nothing will come up. So the bacteria just manifests itself and grows and gets nastier.

After the honor choir, I walk outside, thankful that I will be enjoying a three day weekend, to find that it has been raining for most of the concert. Two hours. That's a lot of ice accumulation. So in my debilitated state, with a cracked rib, I scraped the windows and prayed that the van (which I accurately described to my students as something that we had taken on an epic road trip, and this van is the aftermath of that road trip...) would get me back to Des Moines.

It did.

But when I got back to the bus barn, I had to scrape my SUV's windows. Then I had to run to Target to get more cough syrup. It was a terrible night.

Friday, I woke up feeling mildly better. Debilitating cough was still lingering, but at least my spirits were up some. I had a conference, but spent a large portion of the day in bed. Hopefully, my administration doesn't read that. Although the Wednesday prior my principal did stop me in the hallway and say, "Laura... you should be at home resting." To which I replied, "I would love to Mike, BUT I have to get your daughter ready for an honor choir." Which was true. And it was his daughter whose concert I sat through, hardly able to breathe.

Saturday, I was feeling even better yet, and my best friend stole me to go shopping. But as the day wore on and we continued to go in and out of the cold weather, my cough got worse, and I was getting more and more worn down. By the time I got home that evening, I was spent. I could hardly move to go up to bed. But, I made it and woke up Sunday even worse that I think I was the night before.

I tried to talk Eric into letting me (yes, read: letting me) go to Urgent Care, but he doesn't really believe in that type of thing. Just like my dad - just take vitamins, drink lots of fluid and rest, "you'll be fine." I had a measly 30 puffs left on my inhaler, to which I was like a crazed drug addict trying to carefully time each puff so it would last until I went to the doctor on Monday.

I cried about three or four times on Sunday, simply frustrated with the fact that I was just not getting any better. I was still peeing almost every time I coughed, I was still putting my head between my legs and cradling my cracked rib every time I coughed. I was frustrated that I couldn't be the parent to James that I want to be, and I was frustrated that I couldn't do anything but lay in bed, cough, and pee. And drink lots and lots of water.

So Monday I woke up, called into work, and made a doctor's appointment. And I was so emotionally distraught from not being back to "normal" that when it was time to leave for the appointment, I couldn't find my keys. Eric had driven my car on Sunday and has a bad habit of taking the keys out of the ignition. We don't have a spare set, so when I couldn't find them on Monday morning, I started freaking out. Simply because, I had to get to the doctor, and there was no other way I could make it there.

I found my keys and got into my car. Depressed my brake, shifted into reverse and started rolling down the driveway. Wait, that's not supposed to happen. Yes, that's right, on top of all of that, I had no brakes.

So I drove using my parking brake, and 3rd and 2nd on my drive shaft (thank God I have owned and driven 5-speeds before, otherwise I'd never know how to rev my RPM's to slow my car down). It was a hairy mile to the doctor's office (our neighborhood is within 2 miles of everything we could need, including an amusement park), but I made it and stumbled in, bawling my eyes out. I was absolutely done with it all.

The doctor really wanted to run chest x-rays to rule out pneumonia (what??) but obviously, x-rays are not safe for pregnant women. So instead, she listened intently to my breathing for awhile, looked in about every crevice on my face, and decided to instead put me on heavy-duty schedule b (as in, safe for baby), antibiotics and steroids. For my debilitating cough, she happily refilled my inhaler.

When I went to fill my prescriptions (still without brakes, mind you, which was interesting), I found out that since I'm actually not asthmatic, my insurance would not cover my inahler for another eight days. That's right. They will only cover a refill every 20 days. So they expect you to take 10 puffs per day, maximum. In the words of my doctor, "So you've been using your inhaler more than twice every four hours?" Umm, yeah.

It would be $70 to refill the inhaler without insurance. I just wasn't sick enough to justify that, so I just went with the heavy-duty steroids and antibiotics.

I started them immediately and instead of going back to bed, made a phone call to my mechanic, then took my car out to his house. In the freezing cold. Looking like hell. And coughing the entire time.

On Tuesday, I headed back to school. Everyone told me that I needed to go back home and rest, but I had several reasons why I shouldn't:

1) It was the last day before Thanksgiving break. I needed to see my kiddos before I wouldn't see them again for another 5 days. This was because 2) I hadn't seen them for five days prior to that, thanks to the honor choir, conference, and being sick on Monday. I also knew it would be an easy day because 3) there was "violent threat" made to the general K-12 student population on a bathroom wall, so over 250 of the 400 students were gone for the day. Out of the 80 students i have standing in front of me on any given day, I had about 40. And in another class, I had 10. And finally, 4) it's me. My sudden burst of energy on Monday told me I was going to school on Tuesday. Not to mention, I need all the maternity leave I can get, so I don't want to take any more sick days!!!

So there you have it. And on Tuesday, as I was sitting there feeling sorry for myself because my mechanic called and told me it would be $700 to fix my brakes, something amazing happened.

I felt Baby Engels for the first time. And while I still can't make it through a sentence without coughing, I still have to bend over and cradle my ribs when I do cough, and I still pee a little every time, to feel those movements again and know that my little bean is ok means everything. It washed away all the pity I was feeling for myself. It (almost) washed away the $700 car bill I was going to have to pay. It was lovely.

So here's to 16 weeks. Let's hope the wellness boat continues to sail!

How far along? 16 weeks!
Maternity clothes? Considering I spent most of this past week in bed, my sweats and old t-shirts have been working just fine for me. I did wear to school a non-maternity sweater and regular jeans, but at this point, what's the use? It was sort of uncomfortable.
Weight gain? I went to the doctor on Monday and they weighed me with boots and sweats and jacket on. I didn't care. And I was still under my pre-pregnancy (James) weight. Unbelievable. I have a feeling that will change with the steroids and Thanksgiving food.
Stretch marks? No. Still lathering on the lotion.
Best moment this week? It's a toss-up between actually starting to feel better and going shopping with the bestie on Saturday without our children. I loved it, even though by the end of the day I wasn't feeling so hot. BUT it was worth it and so awesome to see her. I love spending time with her and wish we could do it more often. We're just so busy with so many different things, it can be really difficult. However, when we do spend time together, it's always more meaningful because of that.
Miss anything? Again, breathing without coughing. Speaking full sentences without coughing. Just breathing normal in general.
Movement? Yes, a very definite "pop pop pop" that was absolutely Baby Engels. Super exciting!
Food cravings? Still stuffing my face with frozen fruit bars. Delicious. And they make my burning esophagus feel better. And I've been craving those Mexican roll-ups? Some peopel make them with cream cheese and AE Mexican Dip, or some use cream cheese and ranch dressing? Either way, I use the latter, and add pimentos, green and red peppers, and green onion. Delicious. I made those today for Eric and my Thanksgiving feast tomorrow, and I've already eaten two tortilla shells full of cream cheesy goodness. I can't help it, they're delicious. I can't wait to have more tomorrow.
Anything make you queasy or sick? Not really this week. More like feeling sorry for myself!
Labor signs? No!
Symptoms? Is feeling better a symptom? Thank the Lord!
Belly button in or out? In!
Linea nigra? Nope! Nothing yet!
Wedding ring on or off? On!
Happy or moody?  Very moody, but rightfully so, I'd say.
Looking forward to: Thanksgiving with my boys tomorrow. I can't wait to spend the day watching movies, and hanging out, and not have to worry about the bullshit of family that will come on Friday night/Saturday. And being able to teach next week without a cough! Hopefully, it's gone by then!