Oh boy, oh boy... or girl?

Thursday, September 12

Well, you're here. All .13 inches of you, packing a furious punch with nausea, fatigue and the urge to pee every second of every day!

After Eric and I had James, we knew we would want at least two children close in age. Then James grew into a toddler and that decision was staring back in our faces saying, it's tiiiiiiii-iiiiiime!

So we looked at where we are at in our lives. We have a happy, healthy baby boy, we have good jobs, Eric's business is doing relatively well, and consistently, which is important, and we are happy with our lives. So we went with it and low and behold, we got pregnant the first try. Again. For not wanting to have children for awhile, I sure do have an easy time getting pregnant! Maybe it's God showing me that things can be easy...

We found out last Friday morning and today we are officially five weeks along!

So far this pregnancy is nothing like the first. I knew the second I was pregnant, at what would be about 3 weeks or so. I felt a tingling in my breasts and looked in the mirror after my shower - boom. Bigger boobs. A few days later I started to get worn down easily and right before my missed period the nausea came. It hasn't been bad and I have been keeping it at bay with lots and lots of small snacks, but it has been touch a go...

Otherwise, I am excited to welcome Baby Engels #2 to our family. Looks like we are in for another adventure!

Sunday September 22
This pregnancy has been exactly like the last. I was doing pretty good up until about six weeks and then boom...morning sickness. It has been an intense journey and Eric has been awesome through all of it. He's been doing a lot with James. He's been cleaning the house, he's been making dinner, he's really been super dad and I am incredibly grateful to him, especially when I'm laying in bed trying to eat my granola bars without throwing up.

True to form I cannot eat anything except food that is really healthy. Tonight I had granola bars and broccoli for dinner. It was the best broccoli and granola bar that I have ever eaten. I am trying sea bands that my friend has recommended to me and those seem to help as well but it still gets pretty bad. I am anxious to see how I will hold up in front of my students for the next couple of weeks. Odds are it will prove to be interesting.

Otherwise we are just waiting for our first appointment on October 7th!

Friday, September 27 10:00 p.m.
Excuse the vulgarity, but holy shit, I just ate the most excellent sandwich I have ever concocted. And as I sat in my living room in my underwear and T-shirt, stuffing my face with this sandwich, I realized the last time I had a sandwich such as this was approximately weeks 7-9 in my pregnancy with James. Yep, still on par for this pregnancy to be right along the lines of the last one! And with my full tummy, I am off to bed!

Monday, October 7
Today we had our baby appointment. We got to hear the woosh-woosh of your tiny heartbeat, we got to see your little hands and feet moving, and because it was a vaginal ultrasound, we saw your tiny heart actually beating. That's what moved me to tears, and even though I didn't cry, it was still an incredible moment.

You're on par to be here May 14. Hopefully, I will be over my morning sickness by then. Hahaha. Last weekend, I forgot to take my pre-natal vitamins all weekend. But low and behold, I felt immensely better on Monday. However, since I took one Sunday night, I felt HORRIBLE come Tuesday. Coincidence? So I haven't been taking them. The doctor didn't seem too concerned, and like Eric always says, "People have been having babies for thousands of years." Although, I stepped on the scale at the doctor's office wearing my maternity leggings, only to find out I don't really need to be wearing them because I'm still under my pre-pregnancy weight. So I guess morning sickness has done something for me, just like it did last time! :)

My O.B. looked at James' stats and said, "8 pounds, 14.5 ounces huh? Let's not do that again, shall we?" Yeah, no kidding. Then he asked me if I had any trouble with pushing him out. I laughed. Let's just say I hope this delivery doesn't have a shift change.

All in all, I feel like shit most days. I feel like a horrible parent to James because I can't get off the couch after work, I feel like puking my guts out at any given moment, and I'm ready to see the light at the end of this first trimester tunnel. Here's to three and a half more weeks (that is, if we're on schedule with the last pregnancy)!

Tuesday, October 15
I have no idea if God (or my dad, maybe?) Took pity on me, but since Sunday afternoon, when I got a spurt of energy, I have been feeling amazing! Except for tonight. Not sure if dinner just didn't sit well or if I am not drinking enough water, but I just feel off. I have a headache and am very tired. But I am getting excited for the big "reveal" that is baby Engels #2. I am making a sequel to the video I made to announce James and can't wait to show it off! Its going to be pretty good.

I have been slowly letting people know I am pregnant. A few coworkers, my administration, the hs  secretaries. I am so excited to tell all my students - I am sure the boys will stare at me wondering how it happened and all the girls will ooh and ahh. It should be lots of fun!

Otherwise, I am just counting down the days. Here's to two more weeks!

Thursday, October 24
How on earth have we already arrive at 11 weeks? Next week we will be in the clear, but we don't have our appointment until almost 13 weeks. I don't want to wait that long to announce you, but I need to hear your heartbeat. Its more for me than anything. Luckily your dad agrees!

Morning sickness is going away! I am getting less and less bouts of debilitating illness and more and more spurts of energy. Our house is still a mess because as soon as we put James to bed, I am spent. But more spurts during the day are happening and that's awesome!

Now we are just looking forward to Halloween, your announcement and quite frankly, I can't wait to tell my students! I just can't wait for the light bulb to come on, like, "oh! That's why you were laying on the floor of your office!" Should be fun! :-)

A quarter way through our pregnancy - only 30 more weeks!

Friday, November 1
So here we are. 12 weeks. I would love to say, "We made it! I feel so much better!" But that would be a farce. In all reality I still feel pretty crappy. The waves of nausea are coming and going much less than they were at 8 weeks, but I still feel exhausted by about two o'clock every day.

In talking with our babysitter, I realized that its because I am not sitting behind a desk this pregnancy. Instead, I am "on" every day, all day. I have to be a disciplinarian, mother, teacher, coach, mentor, and colleague for eight hours every day. At any given moment, someone needs something from me. And its my job to provide those needs.

And that is hard on my body.

I am not the type of person to look lazy, or like I just got out of bed. But I am pretty sure this week I wore black pants, boots and a sweatshirt to school. Yep. I dressed like the veteran teachers who just don't give a shit anymore.

But in my defense, 12 hours of sleep is not enough, and I am tired when I wake up in the mornings. I am tired when I get home and I am tired when I go to bed. I hope it gets better!

In other news, Eric and I have our baby appointment Tuesday at 4. After that, we will go out to eat then on to the Estonian National Orchestra. Say what?! Yes, Eric bought tickets for us to attend the symphony. I cannot wait! Then, we get to upload the video I made and I cannot wait!

Here's to only FOUR MORE DAYS of keeping this all a secret...

Tuesday, November 5
All was well at the appointment today. Heard your little heartbeat again. Now its time to announce you! Can't wait to see everyone's reaction!